lethargic layana love litany

my bed in the morning. please note disarrayed state of clothing items.


layana breakfasts look like this. everyone is definitely checking everyone else out. you quickly note who the regulars are, particularly those that lay claim to a select daily table.


i believe this is course two.


absolutely excellent coffee (perhaps the only perfectly brewed joe in thailand? prove me wrong.), a freshly fried egg, emmental cheese, smoked red snapper, "butcher's ham," and bread with butter, honey, and nutella accompaniments. a fine spread.

today daddles and i must run some errands, and the optimal mode of trasport is clearly by kayak. we get a few layana poolboys to haul one out.


we discuss destination options. he suggests kuala lumpur. i tell him today is our practice day; tomorrow, malaysia.


with greatly skilled maneuvering, we make it past the breakers.

zoombas.

we first hit up last night's dinner destination, the funky fish. dad has misplaced his cap and he believes he knows where. sure enough, it is resting on a beach table, awaiting our arrival. we snag it and paddle away, much like sea banditos.

it turns out that kayaking is pretty much an all-over blast (if a kinda sluggish one). we skid, we skim, we squall our way across the koh lanta bay, talking occasionally of pirates and the like. at one point i may have let slip a "yo," perhaps even a "ho".

about half an hour's journey takes us to our second point of interest, castaway resort. we neglected to bring cold hard cash with us yesterday while diving, and as such skipped over the tipping custom that followed. we feel it was horrendously unclassy of us, thus today we disembark from our dashing kayak, swagger elegantly towards a chic ATM, and do swift, chic business. cameron accepts our offering with grace. we paddle poshly away.

i have a spa appointment at one, but we feel enough time remains for a bit of Ocean Exploration. we head towards Those Rocks Over There, and delightly discover they are mottled with crabs! on second thought, they are somewhat icky. just one crab i like; many crabs look like an infestation. they get icked out by us too and scuttle out of sight.

we take a peek at a neighboring beach. it is unremarkable.


30 minutes later, we are back at the ranch. mom is pooling it, ever-wary of paparazzi.


i go back to the room to discover unwelcoming conditions. it is a siberian iceberg adrift in a sea of warm, humid climes! 20 degrees celsius is 68 degrees farenheit, by the way.


my sleeping spot, take two [afternoon]. the housekeepers here are incredible. all my clothes have been folded and sorted.


even dad's coin accumulation has been stacked. it elicits a "wowza" on a twice-daily basis (they come once in the morning and once in the evening, of course).

we head to the spa. mom and i do the hot stone massage and we mellllllllllllllllllt. it's lovely. i then head out; mom continues with an indian head massage and dad shuffles in for a swedish beating.


later: the girls kick it.


i spied an incredible shot, for which i had to bring the camera periously into the pool. as soon as i lined it up, these GOOBERS inserted their bodies into my frame. the gall!


i tried cropping, but it wasn't the same.


by the time they had vacated the premises, the sun was no longer quite so glorious - but the shot is passable.


friday night is PHUKET LOBSTAH NIGHT at layana, so we decided to have our "western dinner." however, the western portion of the menu simply didn't invite, so we stuck with some thai favorites. i also -finally- learned how to override the camera's auto settings, so toyed with taking some longer-exposure macro night shots. here pictured is breaded soft shelled crab.


spicy pomelo salad.


the night called for prosecco. also all-natural mosquito repellant.


the LOBSTAHHHH! we got the last one. i am certain The Disappointed counted in the hundreds. it was grilled and durn tasty, especially with the Lobstah Sauce.


desserty times: tiramisu and lemon tart with sea cucumber cream.


fotos, fotos.


dad and i constructed a friend out of the sea cucumber, but he was more difficult of a subject then i hoped.

back to the room. we'd been sleeping with just massive comforters every night, failing to locate anything lighter, so everyone got the howling fantods when dad discovered a sheet. upon further examination, it appears he just tore up the bed a little and called his findings sheet-like.

i infinitely jest until my eye refuse any further abuse. i dream of tall asian men who wink at me.